Redesigning relationships in your life series - part 1 - Family

Updated: Apr 29

In life, we often struggle with understanding and managing the relationships we have with others. These relationships are across all parts of our life, from home to work and our social spaces.

The pressures of life, to juggle all the relationships balls at once, frequently become too much for many of us to handle. We shift between dropping one ball, to wanting to quite possibly, chuck in the towel completely at times.

Are you struggling to juggle all the relationships in your life? Which ones are causing the most problems? If you are? Know that you are not alone.

There is a road map for a better way forward but to discover it. First, you must put down the old map, so that you can learn how to redesign your relationships, with a whole new map in hand.

In the coming weeks, we will take a look at the different relationship groups, so that we can understand how to redesign them for success, rather than setting them up for failure.

In this first part of the series, we will start with family. In the spheres of security in life, this is your inner circle.

From a young age, we all have had to learn to juggle many relationships. Whilst growing up, the most significant were the relationships within our immediate family unit. The inner circle of mum, dad, brothers and sisters. This potentially, looks completely different for everyone because family units can be broken, family members lost, and families divided through a variety of reasons in life.

We frequently muddy the waters even further, with step-parents and divided homes where our family unit is on occasions split up, and we move between home spaces. This can be a difficult split for children, moving between Mum's and Dad's separate homes, as part of their everyday life.

This is the modern world, and as children, many of us have grown up in this way. So it is easy to see how family relationships become complicated right from the very beginning.

Then, to add fuel to the fire, depending on your situation. There is the potential of a large extended family unit of grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins, complicating life’s relationships further.

This does not even take into consideration the family unit extensions that developed through life’s changes beyond your immediate family.

As we become adults, we develop special relationships where we seek a partner, and in the process, we thrust our family relationships together in one fell swoop. Whether this is a long or short term partnership, marriage or other, we are constantly shifting and redefining the relationships in our family unit, and in many cases extend to create a family unit of our own.

It is no wonder family relationships are complex, and frequently feel like pressure chambers, where we are pushed and pulled from all directions. The way families extend, change and grow constantly throughout life, brings about the potential to rise to change and growth in us all. Some of us fight the change, some embrace it and the vast majority of us play the tug of war game somewhere in between.

Where are you?

Are you struggling with the dynamics of your inner circle family relationships? If you are, guess what you are not alone because we all are in some way. It is simply called living.

There is, however, limitless potential for a better way. To understand this, we first need to understand the dynamics at play, the role we currently play, and the role we could play.

Are you the antagonist, the glue or the runaway in your family unit? What is your current role in the consistently growing and evolving, greater family space in your life?

Just as your family will grow and change so too can your position and perspective that you take. The ball is in your court, and how you choose to respond to your circumstances is completely in your control.

Want to know how mindfulness can help you navigate the minefield of family relationships more successfully?

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