Transformation is possible in the darkest of moments

Updated: Oct 5, 2020

There is a beautiful yogic philosophy that I like to live by because in my darkest moments it has single-handedly taught me more in life than anything else. In fact, in those moments it transformed my life completely.

‘Sit with your suffering until it becomes your blessing’. This is a much simpler concept than you may first think. We tend to sit with our suffering in life very heavily but in this principle, it is about holding it in your space a little more gently. In the darkest of moments in my life, this very concept gave me the resilience to not only survive but to thrive in the midst of everything life had to throw at me. For I learned to understand that if I sat with something quietly and peacefully it softened. So instead of trying to let go I simply loosened my grip and thats when the magic happened.

There have been times when the tunnel became very dark indeed for me, as I know it has for many people I've met. We all must endure suffering in life, for it is the not so nice part of living. The question is how do you choose to endure your suffering? There is a big difference between surviving and thriving in this world. I’m guessing you like me would rather thrive. The truth of the matter is the vast majority of people are just surviving, and some barely even that. To thrive I turned my suffering into an opportunity to learn from, grow and transform.

5 years ago I began a journey of understanding to learn the difference between my current position at the time 'surviving' and the place I wanted to be in, 'thriving'. At the time I had personally hit rock bottom and for what seemed no apparent reason at all. I felt as though there was a black cloud hanging over me and no matter what I did I couldn’t shift it.

Have you felt like this? Like something was sucking the life out of you? but you didn’t know what it was. Did it seemingly come from nowhere?

I had a good job, good friends, and on the surface, all seemed well to others. You see I was everything to everyone. You know the go-to person, stable and solid. I fixed everything for everyone. Is this sounding familiar? I had completely backed myself into the corner. I had an overwhelming sense of complete emptiness inside me, whilst on the surface, everything looked great. If you have been there or are there right now I understand and I’m here to help.

It’s not a place anyone wants to be and no amount of avoidance makes it go away. Believe me, for my entire life I developed the most complex set of avoidance techniques in an attempt to survive. This may have taught me resilience but it also did many other things that were neither helpful nor enjoyable in my life. In fact, my ability to bounce back and soldier on caused me deep personal suffering because I became harsh, distant and disconnected from people. The very opposite of my true nature.

Eventually, just like it did for me, life has a way of catching up with you. This is what created my immovable black cloud. If this is resonating with you, I am here today not to wallow with you but to actually bring you hope. For the light at the end of the tunnel is real, it is the tunnel that is not and it is holding your mind hostage. Created over time to become darker and longer. You can like I did lose the tunnel completely and open yourself to a brand new world filled with light.

With the support of an incredible person, I learned to not only survive but to thrive. For the very first time, I decided to seriously look inside myself because I realised that I was seeking happiness and success externally from other people and things. None of these things brought me long term happiness in my life. Are you thriving or surviving? It is a choice that you and only you can make, but be sure it most definitely is a choice. I chose survival because I thought it was my only option I had. I know now that it is most definitely not.

Through the journey inward I discovered who I was authentically. Not who people expected me to be or what I had become through social and cultural conditioning. I discovered the real me, hidden below the surface. It was truly magical what I found. Everyone has this magic within them.

As a young child, I had an overwhelming feeling that I had to save the world and everyone in it. It was a burden I couldn’t explain to anyone until I was in my 40’s. In reality, I merely had to save myself and show others the way. Today that is exactly what I do. I help lead others on the journey to discover their very own magic. My heart sings each and every time I see that light come on for others. That very first moment they catch a glimpse of their authenticity. Right there in their eyes, I can see they have felt the touch of home. A blessing to witness that I never take for granted.

Today I am filled with immense hope for the future, even as I write this whilst in Melbourne during stage 4 lockdown in the middle of the COVID19 pandemic. Be the change you want to see in the world and then the world will change. It really is possible. The ripple effect of change is incredibly strong.

First, all you have to do is start, by understanding who you really are on the inside and show up in the world authentically. Then and only then will the world begin to change for us all.

In continuing to share my story, my wish is that it brings you hope. You are next so let’s get moving because the world is waiting for you to make a difference too and I am here to help.


If you would like to know how I can help don't hesitate to reach out.

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